Dear Consumers:

Happy Black Friday! Crazy idea I’m having—feel me out: let’s NOT buy anything today. Let’s just ask for things! And give each other things we already have. Right? Of course. I’m all for capitalism, but I think that we aren’t necessarily wired to be such crazy spenders. Do eggs buy sperm? Do babies buy milk? In the end, we’re all just giving to landfills that don’t give us much good in return.

I believe we can slow down the journey from factory to dump if we nurse old things for longer periods. High five for hanging on to that first generation LG EnV flip phone, sister girlfriend.  What’s more, we could try sharing things more than we already do. If you are tired of something that you’ve had for a while, go play with someone else’s thing. Then you can rollover and check your iPhone. But first: swap computers.

Por exemplo: This year, I’m asking the universe for a used Mac. Preferably a laptop. In this wide, wide world, there’s got to be someone out there with a decently-functional old December 08 one sitting around looking like something Miss Havisham would use if she were visiting The Jetsons.

And what am I giving in return? A very nice HP netbook.  And…some key chains. And homemade cookies. If technologically sophisticated objects have become so important to us, then why are we so quick to get rid of them when they’re still good? Why do we think nothing of selling them to complete strangers on Craigslist? Your beloved object deserves a permanent home. I will honor your treasured belongings. I will treat your old Mac as if I birthed it myself. I will send you periodic photos if you’d like. I’ll even keep its hard drive’s name. Do you think you’re going to get this kind of offer from the Smithsonian? Or maybe you’d rather your slightly-scratched MacBook go live in the home of some mustached, cat-obsessed Astoria-dwelling Craigslist-trawler who will visit sites that have names that my fingers are too pure to type. Yes, I’m talking kitty porn.

For those of you who MUST spend on this dark day, hop on this ASAP:

PRESENTING THE UNIQUE

What would you do with an old, outlasted thing like an original Polaroid truck? Just leave it in the garage? Drive it to death? Sell it on ebay? Assisted by the experts and terrific bag creators of the legendary Swiss label FREITAG we carefully sliced an old Polaroid truck tarpaulin into pieces, spent 1000 hours of handwork and are now proud to present this unique and special Polaroid Freitag Edition. Be aware that there is no more tarpaulin left, so this is your final chance to get one of these unique special Editions:

POLAPREMIUM - :: A Black and White Friday ::