Just a few years ago there were no virtual social networks, no synchronized address books, and no smartphones. But people had social networks and phones, and they had to memorize and organize thousands of contacts. Or have a Rolodex.
Ain’t it interesting that even websites— which, in my mind, are still kind of futuristic-ish — can look this dated? Even the future is obsolete!
In recent months I’ve been dabbling in the world of embroidery. Dangerous territory, I know. But I try to use clean needles.
I’ve mostly been making up my own designs as I go, but there are some fun patterns out there that you can buy for pretty cheap. Apparently, obsolete things are especially fun to embroider! Feeling Stitchy just offered up this lovely set of CRT screens she stitched using patterns from the store andwabisabi, which also makes a pattern for a stitched boombox.
This got me curious about what other embroidered images of obsolete objects were available online. Here are some of my findings.
By Lucky Jackson. Original hand embroidered piece on vintage fabric.
Cassette tape pattern by PeptoGirl.
Embroidered Molkeskines by Nowvember.
Embroidered cameras by TinyBazaar.
This video about OBSOLETE, which was made by Mike Kravinsky of NextNik.com, was featured last week on ABC News Now. I posted the video when he first made it, but that was before it was featured on old school teleovision! Thanks again, Mike!
In OBSOLETE I talk about how phone sex is going bye-bye, thanks to sexting, IM sex and other forms of online sex (which I wrote about a few years ago on Salon).
I don’t write about this in the book, but I have a theory that there’s eventually going to a backlash against all this sexy technology. Personally, I like to do it retro style—without denying myself the pleasures of modern technology, that is. Just put the video chat screen in black-and-white mode, turn off the sound, get some speech to tech software that turns your words into subtitles at the bottom of your lover’s screen… For the full effect, slip an asprin into your Coke and draw a silk-stocking seam on the back of your leg. NOW you’re really partying like it’s 1929. As my 17-year-old cousin would say: Yummy!
ANYWAY, I mention this 1985 Village People production in OBSOLETE, but I could’ve written the entire book solely on this video. I would do it right now, but I have to go take a bath in eggnog. So, I will not bore you with any more of my silly ramblings. Really, this baby needs no ramp up.
I humbly offer this as my Christmas present to you.
OBSOLETE WITH SOMETHING OBSOLETE
Reader Anh Chi Bui just sent this photo. Not sure I’ve ever seen this model of Polaroid before. Also: I don’t quite understand how this picture was taken. Was it taken with the Polaroid?
In any case, I love it. Look for an obsolete hotel keychain in a mailbox near you, ACB!
Italy, man. They love me! I think. I keep seeing these pieces about OBSOLETE in Italian. I think they’re nice, but maybe they’re not. Anyone out there habla Italianoni?
L’enciclopedia delle cose che non useremo più - Mag - SKY.it
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
A few weeks ago Adam Phillips, a reporter with Voice of America, recorded this fun piece about OBSOLETE. I think it came out really well. Enjoy! Did I mention that OBSOLETE makes a very lovely Christmas gift? And it’s only $10.85! Can you even by kindling that cheap?
Dear Barack and Michelle,
I’m going to be at the Books-a-Million at DuPont Circle on Thursday December 3rd from 5pm to 7pm. Why don’t you come on and by and say “Hi!” Great. See you there.
xo
Annie
Dear Urban Outfitters:
Why are you selling these postcards of obsolete objects but have neglected to stock your stores with a book about such objects? A book called OBSOLETE? It’s the cool thing to do. Barnes & Noble is doing it. Borders is doing it. But not YOU! Get with it, UO. Books are cool. Actually, they’re so uncool that they’ve circling back to cool. Like cinch-waist pants. I’ve been thinking about reading one myself.
Books are the future. Invest in it! Invest in my future! Mama needs a new pair of pre-rumpled corduroys. Or does your company plan to make its fortune from selling ironic lampshades forever?
Sincerely,
Jean Nana Ssorgman
PS: Ithaca is Gorges!
Apparently, OBSOLETE’s publisher, Abrams, was having a book-giveaway via Twitter yesterday. I didn’t catch on to this until today. D’oh! Ah well. Wait, I already have one!
I have a feeling, however, that they may keep the lines open for another day or so. So, if you like free stuff, go onto Twitter and write “@ABRAMSbooks is giving away Obsolete for #free today! RT this for a chance to win http://ow.ly/xiuQ #abrams60”
Mmkay?
If you REALLY like free junk, email me a photo of OBSOLETE with something that’s obsolete, and I’ll send you a limited edition obsolete hotel key chain.
Another installment of Object So Obsolete That You Probably Don’t Even Know What It Was For.
Saw this this weekend in Philadelphia. Anyone know?
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MEET THE AUTHOR
Anna Grossman is writing this bio in the third person. She is a New York-based freelance writer specializing in lifestyle and entertainment features. She is 5'7" and has been described as "nice." Su esposo, Jesus, enseñandola Espanol. Email her if you feel like it: GrossmanAJ@Gmail.com
MEET THE ILLUSTRATOR
James Gulliver Hancock is an internationally acclaimed artist who crosses as many mediums as he does borders. James is constantly on the move, having been involved in artist projects and residencies in Indonesia, Austria, France, the U.K. and America. He is currently located in Los Angeles and works on projects in Europe, America and Australia. His work is as varied as his travels, encompassing editorial illustration for magazines, commissions for music group artwork and animations, work with disabled children on logo designs, creating gigantic set illustrations for performances and TV.
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CONTACT: ObsoleteTheBook@ Gmail.com. Because books love to check email.
FOR PRESS OR SPEAKING INQUIRIES: email Jessica Alter
